ThE CHoiCEs We MaDe..

As with anything in life, I think the more we come to know who we are, the more we know who or what fits us. Certainly not everyone will attract or match us completely - sometimes you meet a great person in life, but for certain reasons he or she is not destined to be the one for you. You think you've found a good match but circumstances just work against you and your relationship never gets it's chance to flourish...Or you meet someone who's unattractive to you physically, but have many other qualities you appreciate.

Knowing ourselves takes time - it's a lifelong journey. In life, by choosing one road, one person, or relationship, it means that we have to let go of taking some other roads. We can't take them all. I think life just don't work that way. So we have to make choices. Hopefully the choices we make come from a place of clarity.

Often, the only way to get to that clarity is by going through life and learning about ourselves as we go. As we make choices, and are willing to see ourselves clearly, we grow. There will be confusion. The most important thing is to come to know the deepest parts of yourself - to find out what is your real truth and who you really are - and what brings you true happiness. There will never be the perfect road. But we can go deep on the road we do choose.

There are many levels of connectedness, and a true partnership relationship has deep complexities to it. No one choice or person will ever give us everything. And even within a deeply committed relationship, you will have times when a person repulses you, and times when you gain new understandings from them.

In a relationship it takes a lot of time to become good lovers for one another, both sexually, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. You will grow and go a long way from where you started out and you will evolve in these areas as you learn more about yourselves and each other.

For something to be truly strong, like a sturdy tree, it takes time and slow, steady growth, working things out, communicating, being honest, learning about ourselves and others. Attraction is really all about bringing into our lives those people who will help us grow and see ourselves better. And as love grows, so does attraction.

We almost always have the choice, moment by moment, to choose either love, or otherwise. We almost always have the choice, every moment, to get the support we need to change. Any dysfunctional pattern found in a relationship can be healed if people have the willingness to face it. Then there is the opportunity for deep growth to occur, both for the individuals involved, and for the relationship itself. However, if the person is right but the relationship is wrong, then I think our conscience should prevail for sanity's sake. It's often an individual choice.

Most often only when we are willing to meet whatever shows up in the moment with LOVE, Trust and PATIENCE, honesty and clarity, do we find that fulfillment we seek, in relationship, and in every other moment of our lives.